Friday, December 28, 2012

Just one of those days

We are just 3 days away from the 2013 countdown and it really is amazing how time has flown so swiftly this year.

As how life is, I've had my share of bitter sweet memories for 2012 -- but i'm still prodding on with those who matter by my side.

Things have been going quite well albeit the hectic schedule, and I was looking forward to spending the last few days of 2012 in peace with the kids before school commences. Then it started again.

Yet another email cc-ed to me.

It really got to me because her last email to me was this.

to Dayak
Do not reply to this email. I do not want to hear from you. Just make sure Azmi reads every word. I really don't care what he does but at least I have done my duty to put him in the loop, it is his sole responsibility to provide for his son after all.

Just simply pass the message and forget about becoming a "saviour" of the whole situation."

I then replied:

"How do you expect not to reply to you when you ask me to pass this message to Azmi and then offend me by saying what you say? Firstly, I have never insulted you. NEVER in my life. I have never called you names. So,  I do not appreciate you calling me Dayak. [If you wanna call me by my race, it's Kadazandusun].

Secondly, during this whole time, from the time things were okay between Ariff and I -- up till today; I have only defended you and prayed for you and your son. Allah sahaja tahu, and I have had my own disagreements with Azmi with regards to this. All this for Ariff's sake - despite what has been said about me, and what has been misconstrued about my intentions by you.

You ask me to forget about becoming a saviour of the whole situation, but you want me to make sure I get this message across. I really am confused sometimes. When you asked me for help to get Azmi's things out from the house and to talk to Azmi about your financial concerns over Ariff, I did just [that], and now you are upset with me for doing what YOU wanted me to do. I simply don't get it.

I don't know understand why your hatred towards me. Tell me what I have  done wrong to you, so I can understand this. And seek for your forgiveness cause I truly don't understand your motives."

This was back in September.

She never replied. 

Then, 8 days ago - we received another email. This time with a curt FYFA message from her. (Which apparently means For Your Further Action?Thank you twitterverse =))

Initially, I wanted to leave myself out of this after the last correspondence. But when we heard about  cousin A dissing cousin B because she was getting too chummy with my husband and I, (you want her to choose sides? We're not in highschool anymore ladies) AND after cousin B was  asked to play the role of the messenger to make sure "Daphne gets her facts straight" ; I thought perhaps it was high time to settle this amicably like adults.

No "Chinese Whispering". 

My husband suggested a meeting with her, Ariff, me, our parents. 

Hence this email to her.

No reply. I called her today. She said she didn't want to meet up. "No use with someone like you". She hung up. I rang back. She rejects my call. Then her phone is off.

So I sms her. No reply.


Down with fever and having very bad sinusitis, then after seeing the barrage of smses from Ariff literally telling his father and I to "F off" - it was a real downer for us admittedly.

I consoled myself by telling ourselves that perhaps it is Gods' way of protecting us.

That perhaps it is not the time for a reunion.

That we should just concentrate on what's good and positive now - our two girls and our marriage.

Yes. It's one of those days that I feel really sad and down. Didn't help that I received more sad news over bbm just now. =(

My husband hugged me and told me to take some time out for myself.  I'll do so tomorrow.

I hope one day things will be at peace again.

My friend Nora told me that haters will be haters. There is no stopping them.

I want to apologize to those I've wronged... and to those who hate me  "just because", then God bless you and Insya Allah we will all be civil someday soon. If not here, in our afterworld.

We can't please everyone says mum.

True dat.

Love, light and prayers everyone.



  1. 2012... is not the end of the world but really really challenging year... the worst to know that I have cancer just before Christmas... sigh... anyway... be strong Daph!! :)

    1. My dear CathJ, I am sorry to hear about your illness. How are you now? It is a challenging year , but in retrospect, it would be a dull year without all these bitter sweet challenges right? But in your case, I pray that God will grant you a speedy recovery. I really do. God bless and love all around. Happy New Year. xoxo Daphne

  2. Ibnu Abi Dunya meriwayatkan dari Al-Barra beliau berkata bahawa Rasulullah Saw berkhutbah kepada kami hingga terdengar oleh kaum wanita di rumah² mereka. Nabi SAW bersabda yang bermaksud, “Wahai orang-orang yang beriman dengan lidahnya tetapi tidak beriman dengan hatinya, janganlah kalian mengumpat orang-orang muslim dan mencari keaibannya. Sesungguhnya orang yang mencari-cari keaiban saudaranya, maka Allah akan mencari-cari keaibannya. Dan siapa yang keaibannya di cari-cari Allah, maka pasti Allah akan membongkarnya di tengah rumahnya.”

    1. Salam Nurkha,

      Thank you for your comment. We are all creations of God, each bearing imperfections - and we all make mistakes. But I suppose, the most important thing is whether we realise those mistakes and try to make amends of the situation, right?

      I know I am not perfect. But to be accused over and over for things that one has not done, it's painful and does shake ones patience.

      Found this.

      "So fear Allah swt people! & Quit lying about your sisters or you'll be punished for it. We should all be aiming as brothers and sisters to fight against the kuffar who point at our sisters and accuse them falsely, not be of those who accuse our own sisters! Astaghfurallah!"

      Let this be a lesson for all of us, kan? God bless and Happy New Year =)



  3. Dear Daphne,
    "Verily with hardship, comes ease" - Surah 94: Verse 5.
    "Be not sad, surely Allah is with us" - Surah 9: Verse 40

    1. Salam Azreen,

      Thank you for the beautiful Surahs. How comforting....

      Blessed New Year sister,