Saturday, April 19, 2008

Baiboo article One


I stare into the mirror and frown slightly while tracing the curves of my new body shape.

“Sweetheart, do you think I’m fat?”

My husband answers in careful trepidation.

“You are beautiful honey…I love you”

I smile a bit because his answer is so rehearsed, so careful and EXACTLY what I needed to hear.

“But my boobs are sagging and look at all the stretch marks….maybe I should go with Mui’s remedy? And see this?” as I point to my flabby tummy, “ I’ve been doing sit-ups EVERY single day and it still looks like a tub of lard!”

“You are beautiful honey…I love you”

As he scurries off to the kitchen. I turn around to the girl who is responsible for making me feel so insecure about my physical looks.

“Young lady, if only you knew mummy when I was 49kg and had a six pack! Boy…was I hot then!”

The 3month old lass coos and gurgles at the sound of my voice. Her toothless grin makes me stop short of being cross with her. I pick her up and hold her close to my heart.

“ Mummy has a fat bum, a fat bum, a fat bum….mummy has a fat bum with sagging breasts to boot!” (sung to the tune of Mary had a little lamb)

My husband walks in with a bowl of cornflakes. Can’t you sing to a normal nursery rhyme? And perhaps you shouldn’t walk around naked in front of her.

I raise one eyebrow at him.

“ Dude. If I hadn’t gotten my way of a planned C-Section, Isobel would have gone out through my vagina. Besides, we both share the same sex organ!”

My husband knows not to mess with me when I call him “dude”.

“You are beautiful honey…I love you” and he disappears to add more milk into his bowl.

I place her back inside her crib and walk to my walk-in closet.

I pick up my size 24 jeans and turn to look at my expanded ‘prominent’ posterior.

I am no fashion guru, but I do know the rule of thumb. Flaunt the good, hide the bad.

I fold the jeans back and put on my yoga pants.

I think to myself, “Well, at least it’s the adidas Stella McCartney range…if I can’t walk out with nice figure hugging clothes, I will wear baggy, casual comforts in style!”

I plonk myself on the sofa and my husband joins me. “You look nice today. Gym again?”

I sighed.

I’ve been wearing sweatpants and t-shirts ever since she was born. Those who knew Daphne Iking before would naturally think I was off to the gym every single day, right after every single shoot or event. You see, sweatpants to me, pre-pregnancy, were ONLY used for gym or for a long-hauled flight. Or maybe a quick run to the market nearby.

So the truth was, the reliable sportswear were comfortable and hid my flaws, my insecurities. I’d be a complete poser if it weren’t for the fact that I hired a (strict) personal trainer to buff me up so at least gym came into the equation 3 times a week.

“ No gym today sweetheart…”

“Ahhh…so it is poser day today?” he winks.

Lina, my maid, brings our freshly bathed daughter to the living room and I reach out to hold her. I take a long whiff at her baby breath and gaze into those happy, dark greyish brown eyes of hers. Hubby snuggles in closely and embraces his two girls.

At the corner of my eye, I see my protruding tummy and feel slight discomfort on
(stupidly) donning my pre-pregnancy g-strings (Spare me the lecture on wearing tight undergarments – I’m just in denial!)

I adjust the wedgie and play with my girl’s hair. She snorts back which tickles her parents.

“Oh Isobel! I’m just a mummy who is trying to love her new body shape”

She buries her head in between my breasts as if she were to comfort me.
My husband wraps his arm around my shoulder and says the magical words.

“You are beautiful…I love you” he says to both Isobel and myself.

Feeling the tenderness in the air, I kiss him on the cheek. This time around, I believe him.

23 comments:

  1. welcome to the world of sweatpants post pregnancy! btw u still look gorgeous

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  2. Hi Daphne. I've gone through C-sect as well. I wonder how does the wound looks on you coz it's quite annoying to see mine on my tummy. Plus i can still feel the pain sometimes, i cant even do the sit-ups yet. Oh, and my baby is 10 mths old

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  3. don't worry. a lot of my friends tell me they think you're hot. :)

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  4. Hi Daphne!!! You don't look fat at all!!! I just saw you at the Miss Sabah Universe event, and you looked hot and gorgeous! Marina (Mark Malim's sister) here btw. The pic with took together can be found at my brother's forum site web under Photos (www.markmalim.com). Daphne, I've been trying to get your contact, coz I wish to interview you for my project. Can I email/ courier the questions to you? ** Eager to hear from you. Take care! =)

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  5. dare to believe...

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  6. "I smile a bit because his answer is so rehearsed, so careful and EXACTLY what I needed to hear." hehehe i like this...

    nice story daph...i like...everything will go well with you...no worries... :)

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  7. you still look beautiful.
    i have a question actually. my skin has never been good,and whenever i fall down, the wound will heal but there will be scar. so if i choose c-section will my scar heal well?

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  8. Hi Daphne! saw u on 'the breakfast show'. i really wish to see u more in dresses than sweatpants. u look gorgeous with dresses! =)

    and u still have me as one of ur many many fans to support u! =D

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  9. Daphne!!

    At least you're going to the gym. I've been 'working out' with my books instead of being at the gym. That day when I first met you at the gym, I noticed that you had a trainer helping you. So you've finally got yourself a PT huh?

    As for your post, I find it so honest and so beautifully written. Simple words indeed but you've mentioned things that no one would have dared mentioning. And btw, your husband is right. You ARE beautiful. I didn't get to tell you this but when I saw you at the gym, you were really glowing (not from the sweat la of course!).

    Good luck with everything! :)

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  10. dear daphne,

    u r beautiful
    n will always be

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  11. hello...
    can i recommend to u all 'bio-oil'? it is the answer for marks/scars/pregnancy scars for us here in nz
    i wonder whether it is sold in malaysia?
    it works! :)

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  12. Hi Daphne, have you tried cloth diapers on your lil' girl? If you haven't you should start reading about it. We have our very own cloth diaper (CD) lady in KK. visit www.miabambina.com to read abt CD and how it can help your cute little girl, you and the environment :) Oh btw, you can get addicted with it!! Be warned ;p

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  13. Hello Daphne...

    I just gave birth to a healthy baby boy on 22nd April, 2008 and am a Baiboo member as well...im a big fan of yours and really adore you..you still look great even after birth and you are such a fabulous mom! Hawtt Mama n still sexay! U don't have to worry much coz I think you're perfect enuf coz u still have that beautiful adorable body,nice skin without ugly looking stretch marks like i do...Ur little princess is also so adorable u shud be happy and proud of what you have now.Congratulations to you once again n keep posting pics ya! I really enjoy reading ur blog n viewing pics here...cool! Take care n all the best hawtt mama!

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  14. Gorgues...

    Prettyy..

    I dont mind be your 2nd husband

    hahahah!!

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  15. I just received my SHAPE magazine and Daphne, you look great!! An inspiration for me when I become pregnant next time! =) Kudos and lookin good there!

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  16. what a great post :D
    maybe we should all get together, take tuition from ryan and go, 'you're beautiful... we love you!'

    power in numbers? ha ha

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  17. welcome to virgin mother club - this applies only those who go trough 'c-section'.I just hate it to notice that lil flabby wobbly tummy of mine still hanging there even after 5 mths (that includes my routine of diet,exercise,sauna,n etc) .The power of ignorance is not working anymore though.Anyway daphne,saw u at marc jacob events,damn u fucking hot !!! ahhhh soo jeles laaaa....soo stopp complaining !!!!

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  18. hi daphne. i gotta agree wit everyone, you still look great. anyway, u must visit www.miabambina.com like aunty j said. cd's are addictive n ur lil' one's butt will nvr look cuter.

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  19. I still think that you are hot. But i appreciate you graphic description ( too much details !) that shows your caring thoughts.

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  20. Hey Daphne! You look great! Btw the baby is so cute!! =D

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  21. Hi Daphne! I have also received my The SHAPE magazine and you really look gorgeous! :')

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  22. Hey, u look gorgeous hot mum! like your writings about pregnancy and stuff.. it's just so real! way to go !

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  23. you're beautiful as you are.. hot momma :)

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