Wednesday, October 18, 2006

Menjaga Keselamatan Anda during this Festive Season

Read about my friend's ordeal about her getting stopped at a roadblock recently -- and she was booked cause her license sudah expire.

She (had to show) that she had only RM5 in her wallet (just one of those days u have no time to tit-tit at the ATM), so she got booked. What pissed her posterior off was the fact that when she asked why there was so many roadblocks lately, she was given the answer: (and I quote)

Mr.S: Di musim perayaan ini, ada banyak kes-kes ragut. Oleh itu, roadblock ini adalah untuk menjaga keselamatan kamu
This festive season, there is an increase in the crime rates. So we have more roadblocks to keep you safe.

Me: *Jaw drops, silence ensues* WTFWTFWTF?

What the fuck dudes... That was the funniest shit I heard the whole week! Increase in crime rates so have more roadblocks? I wanted to laugh my ass off because all I could think of at that time was, the only robbers are the cops. Please, the only reason why they have more roadblock is because they want to find fault with us so they can get us to bribe them!

In the first place, this whole 'settle' thing shouldn't even happen. When they see my expired license, they should just issue me a fine, not ask me if I want to settle or not. Fuckers... bloodsuckers.

'Menjaga keselamatan anda' my ass! I am even more scared when they are around because they commit daylight robbery. All in the name of justice....

fucking hell...u r absoulutely right Ms Pink! I kena also. I knew what they wanted, so after calmly putting down my mobile (u now know my offence), I digged into my wallet, produced my (still valid) license about the time he approached my window.

P:"u tau salah u kan"
(handing over the license)
P:"jadi macam mana?"
D:"saman lah"
P:" u dari kelantan ah?"(peers at my registration plate)
(no bozo...look at my drivers permit and u will see Im from some kg in Sabah"
P:"ini banyak mahal oh ah moi"
(I'm not chink..)
D:"takpe lah...saya sudah salah...saman lah"
(fiddle..fiddle...i continue eating my roti kaya without missing a beat)
P:"betul ah?"
D: (Duh!) "yup..."
(fiddle..fiddle..go and see his superior)
D:"bang...boleh cepat sikit ah?saya ada appointment la"
(he looks at me tad bit upset)
(sorry...I have no money for Raya too)


This technique has worked for me in 2 ways:

one, either they saman u
two, they let u go away cause they think u r 'so stupid one..don't know how to haggle'.

berhati-hati di jalan raya masa Deeparaya. seatbelts on, make sure ure license/roadtax ok, no talking/smsing on your mobile.

Oh..and don't go 160km/h around the bend!


  1. hah.
    crita pasal bribe last monday,first time in my life i kena tahan ngan police traffic. mmg i salah sbb u-turn kat no entry area sambil cakap phone.

    p:awak nih dah la salah,pastu dok cakap phone plak
    me:(i sengih jer)
    p:bagi lesen
    me:(i bagi)
    p:hmm nak pegi mana ni
    me:nak balik buka puasa la pakcik
    p:nih nak kira camna nih,kamu nak saman ker kamu nak 'derma' kat saya utk sekolah nih

    at the same time dia ada pegang satu brochure yg bebudak sekolah kutip derma tuh sambil cakap 'nama awak cantik la'

    me:pakcik saman ja la..saya tadak cash la
    p:ok.kamu ada brapa skang?
    me:(i dah sengih dah)la pakcik...saya mmg tadak cash..pakcik saman ja la..saya tak kisah
    p:(sambil hulurkan my license)ok la..esok ker lusa ker ko lalu area nih balik,ko kasi la aku derma nanti..ok?
    me:ohhh ok..tq

    can you imagine that?
    they are really desperate to make more money.sedey la diorang camnih

  2. Babe, I came to realize that out of 10 driving Malaysians, 8 would have kena-ed the bribe proposal. It's sad! And out of 8, prolly 6 would have paid up because they don't want the hassle to go to the police station to pay the fine. I guess we are getting tired of the whole bribe issue so most of us would just ask them to fine us. I think if together we do the same thing, as in don't bribe and just get them to fine us; maybe, just MAYBE the cops will realize that they can't get anything out of us public anymore...

    Come to think of it, it's damn ironic to talk to that officer through my window cause from that level, all I could see was the 'Saya tidak menerima rasuah' badge. LOL

  3. Check out today's Utusan..

    "Sistem Rondaan Berbasikal diperkenalkan sebagai satu pendekatan baru untuk mencegah jenayah terutama kecurian dan ragut di sekitar pusat bandar selain dapat merapatkan lagi hubungan dengan orang ramai."

    I bet all the mat rempits and peraguts would die laughing.. Nice approach dudes.. make them laugh so hard that they'd stop doing vices.. :P

  4. Serve you right... never use hands free kit haha. Don't blame the caller!

  5. This is the age old tale when it comes to festivities...they have to collect their duit raya before raya, kan?

    Totally agree with you to just take the saman! I would!

    On another note, I had a friend who got asked for duit kopi in the police station! Can you imagine that! They didn't want to release her car (which got towed away for illegal parking - serves her right...) if she didn't belanja kopi. She insisted for a summon and they finally gave it to her after they realised she wouldn't support the duit kopi campaign...


    Drive safe peeps!